My almost 7 y.o. is in first grade. At the parent/teacher conference, my wife told the teacher that bribes and potential consequences don’t really affect Eddy. He won’t perform better just to get a reward. He’ll act the way HE wants to. And the THREAT of losing something doesn’t work unless it’s something really important. So my wife said “go ahead, try another sticker chart (for good behavior) or your reward system, but you have our permission to put him in time out if you need to.”
The class gets “pennies” for good behavior. Every friday they can buy little prizes for at least 10, or save them up for an auction with bigger prizes. We called them “bonus cards” when I was in school. Same idea. Good behavior +points. Bad -points/pennies. She has another system where students can reward each other for good deeds witnessed. ie. Johnny sees Kimmy do something nice for someone, so Johnny puts Kimmy’s name in the good deed jar. Names are drawn every so often and they get prized too.
so, where do you think this is going?
Teacher: Eddy had a good day monday. 2 stickers. Tuesday morning was good, but that afternoon he offered another classmate reward pennies to put his name in the good deed jar.”
HA HA. He was following her example of bribery. Now, he never broke a rule. She never said you couldn’t do it. I can’t get mad at him for testing a flawed system and checking for loopholes and weaknesses. I did say “If you knew it was wrong and did it anyway, that’s not good. But if you were just pushing boundaries … I can’t get mad for that.” He ended up losing the pennies and the nomination.